Consciously arrange your home as an act of self-love and to support even greater self-love.
This post is an excerpt from my new book, The Self-Love Superpower: The Magical Art of Approving of Yourself No Matter What.
Creating a space that nourishes you is a profound act of self-love, and one that supports you day after day and night after night. Wherever you live now—whether it’s a trailer, a mansion, an apartment, a basement, a penthouse, or someone else’s couch, you can always choose to accept it, love it, and make the very most of it so that you can instantly begin to thrive.
In this post, you’ll find some general guidelines that will help you improve and fine-tune the vibes in your home in a way that you will immediately be able to feel.
First thing’s first: clear your clutter.
Rule number one in creating a positive vibration in your home is to live with what you love, and, by extension, to not live with what you don’t love.
It might help to imagine everything you own as connected to you with a cord of energy: this simply is a way of visualizing your relationship to the item. Then you can imagine that each item is either giving you energy or draining you of energy. Very few items (if any) are neutral in this regard. Either an item makes your life easier, more comfortable, or more beautiful, or it drains you by taking up space, requiring upkeep, or simply dragging you down a little by obstructing the naturally buoyant quality of your home environment.
Always remember that clearing clutter is a lifelong habit. Even after I’ve done the most thorough clutter-clearing imaginable, after as little as a month or two, condiments expire, cupboards and drawers fall into disarray, and I discover clothes in my closet that I no longer want to wear. With this in mind, if you can think of any areas in your home that could use a clutter-clearing tune-up (or if the whole place could use one), take the time you need to clear what needs to be cleared and organize what needs to be organized.
Need help getting motivated? Check out this Clutter Clearing Motivation Jumpstart video.
Not sure how or where to start? Read How and Where to Start Clearing Clutter.
Once you’ve cleared your clutter, you’ll be ready for the following exercise.
Feng Shui Check-In
For this exercise, you will simply be opening your eyes to your home.
Ask yourself: is it (your home) comfortable? Does it make you smile? Does it inspire you? Are you maximizing its potential to be an expression of self-love?
Here are some specific areas to examine when contemplating your answers to these questions:
Do you move through your home with ease? Could you rearrange or shift anything so that it’s easier to move through an average day? (For example, by making things you use regularly more accessible or getting rid of furniture that regularly injures you or makes you uncomfortable?)
Do all your doors open all the way, without sticking or creaking or hitting something? Life feels easier and hassles seem to magically disappear when you don’t store things behind doors in a way that obstructs their full range of motion, and when your doors and locks don’t stick. Creaky doors can also represent annoyances and hold them in place, so oil that hinge if you need to.
Does your artwork make you smile and/or inspire you? And does it all depict something that you would like to experience in your life? Imagery is powerful, and we will subconsciously begin to internalize and play out any dramas or challenges that we even peripherally pick up on in a painting, photo, or sculpture that we see every day in our environment. (Here’s a post about the feng shui dos and don’ts of artwork and imagery.)
Do you have to crouch to see your entire face and head in any mirror? If so, this may be subtly undermining your self-respect. It’s important to easily see your entire head (including the very top of your head) in any mirror on your wall, without having to bend or bow or scrunch in any way. (Want to learn more about feng shui and mirrors? Read Feng Shui and Mirrors: Everything You Need to Know.)
Is your bed comfortable? What about your chairs and anywhere you regularly spend time in the home? This
is a very clear and obvious opportunity to love yourself, and to regularly receive that love: give yourself the gift of comfort and ease no matter where you are in your home. (For more bedroom feng shui, read 5 Feng Shui Tips for the Bedroom.)
Take a good look at the places you habitually sit or recline in your home: can you see the main door to the room from these places, at least peripherally? When you can, it means you’re sitting (or lying) in the power position.
If you’re not in the power position in any area where you regularly spend time, rearrange the furniture so that you are. If this is not possible, you can approximate the power position by placing a mirror in such a way that you are able to see the main door to the room. (Incidentally, this is also a good idea to do in your workspace. Even if you work in a cubicle, you can position a mirror so that you can see the door to your space behind you.) It sounds like a little detail, but being able to see the door is actually a huge deal when it comes to feeling comfortable, grounded, confident, and at home in your body and life. These feelings naturally carry over into the rest of your life—even when you’re not sitting in your home.
Are all your houseplants healthy? If not, do your best to bring them back to a state of vibrant health. If this proves too challenging, give them to a plant whisperer friend or release them from their constant struggle by giving them back to the earth.
And if you don’t have any houseplants, would you like some? Or if you only have a few, would you like some more? Living with healthy houseplants adds oxygen to the environment, cleans the air, and psychologically reminds you that you live in a safe and hospitable place. (If you have pets, make sure to get houseplants that are not toxic to them. Here’s a list of plants that are toxic and nontoxic to both cats and dogs.)
Finally, when you look around your home, does it reflect love back to you? Look for little things you can do in your home to help you feel more pampered and treasured. This will be different for everyone, but to give you some examples, keeping a fruit bowl on your counter is a little luxury but it can make a big difference in how luxurious you feel. Maybe a plush new bath towel will help you feel more like you’re in a day spa than your old bleach-stained one. If your mattress isn’t totally comfortable, you could get a new one, or if that’s too pricey right now, maybe you could find a high-quality memory foam pad that helps you get a better night’s sleep.
The term feng shui directly translates to “wind / water.” This is possibly because feng shui, like both wind and water, is about flow: in the case of feng shui, it’s about how your energy and attention flow when you’re in your home. Can you feel your enthusiasm flow upward like a fountain, and swirl gently and buoyantly like a feather in a fresh breeze?
Don’t be intimidated by all the feng shui “rules” that you may hear or read about or believe that it’s just too complex or exten- sive for you to grasp. After all, feng shui is ultimately all about you: about how you feel in your space and how you can alter it in order to feel even better, and to help yourself feel like the precious and worthy being you are.
You’ll find that living in a space you love and that nourishes your spirit with beauty, comfort, and positive energy is a powerful foundation for learning about self-love and putting it into practice. Even if all you can do is shift one or two things right now, when you do so with the intention to treat yourself like a rare and precious orchid, you’ll be cultivating a rich and fertile soil in which to grow.
Are you going to put the feng shui advice in this post into practice? Or do you have any questions about it? Please share your thoughts in the comments below.
If you liked this post, you’ll love my new book, The Self-Love Superpower: The Magical Art of Approving of Yourself No Matter What.